HONORING, REMEMBERING, LEAVING & LOVING

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Yesterday was my mama's birthday.  It would of been her big 60th.  Kind of weird to think about it.  I would have loved to see her grow into a wise old woman.  I can only imagine how her spirit would of grown through the years. 

I started the day with some time spent in my tee pee in the beautiful morning light while the grass was still dewy.  I made a little alter with her photo, snipped some lavender for her, and placed my teepee crystals around it.  As I was having a conversation with her I look down and a few inches in front of the altar I found this little silver feather charm.  I have no clue where it came from b/c its not one of the styles I ever bought for my jewelry line.  And I don't remember ever having a piece of jewelry with it on it.  But now I will!  I'm going to make myself a little something special with it to remember this day.

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Saturday we had plans to go out to my parents house to spend some time there and start saying our goodbyes since it might sell soon.  We originally tried to get friends and family out there to have a goodbye party, but it just did not work out with anyone, so we cancelled.  By the time saturday rolled around I was just having a really hard day and did not feel like being around anyone.  So instead, my brother and I decided to go out there on sunday, just us, his son, and James.  I'm so glad it turned out the way it did.  It was a really nice day, and it was my Mama's birthday, so it was extra special.  We took a long walk through the woods together, we spread my dad's ashes, and I took it all in...

Since we recently had a flood, the pond that has been dry for ages out there is now completely full and so beautiful.  We walked down by it to spread some of my dad's ashes to find that one of the swan's had returned.  I couldn't believe my eyes.  I just know it was a sign from my mom.  She loved those swans so much and its been so many years since they have been out there due to the drought.  It was an amazing and touching thing to witness on this day.  I didn't have my real camera with me, so the photo above was the best shot I could get.  I'm going to try to get out there and take more soon. 

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Aiden was so sweet helping us spread my dad's ashes.  We put some in the garden, in the fire pit, and in the pond.  I was so glad he was there with us to be a part of it.  Even though he doesn't remember his grandparents, he knows of them, and will always have our stories.

Our friend gave us some flowers to take out there with us, which was such a sweet gesture.  We left some of them on top of dad's ashes in the fire pit.  The rest I took home and made a garland for my window to keep.

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During our time out there I had many little encounters with beautiful animal medicine that was very fitting... The swan for one.  Butterflies + Dragonflies. And I found a snake skeleton.  I have never seen one before, and it was such a cool find. 

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The part of the day had to be when my brother and Aiden came to our house and Aiden got to meet Banjo.  He fell in love with him so hard.  He completely wore my cat out!  Ha ha.  He had so much fun with him and he just kept saying over and over how much he loved Banjo.  Although he asked if he could name him Tickles, ha ha.

I can't think of anything my mother would of wanted more for her birthday then to see her kids hanging out together and enjoying each other.  xo

AT MY NANNA'S FOR MOTHERS DAY

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For Mother's Day we went to visit my Nanna.  I'm so glad I got to see her backyard after all this beautiful rain weve had lately.  Everything is in bloom and looks so amazing.  She has such a way with plants, and the way she creates little vingettes reminds me of myself.  My Nanna is one of my best friends.  The conversations we have on the phone are unparallel to anyone.  We have a very special bond.

I love getting visit with my family, and I especially love it when I get to spend time with my nephew Aiden.  Since he was a wee tot, everytime we get together we take silly selfies.  He thinks its so funny and I just adore it.  One day he won't want to anymore, so I soak it up as much as I can when I see him.  He is such a silly, smart little trickster of a kid.  The personality on this one is wild and he has a heart of gold.  It was so cute watching him give his Nanna her Mother's Day card he made at school.  He was so pleased with himself! 

The cactus pictured above is his cactus, and he filled the pot with 'Grammy beans' (mountain laurel seeds).  He has another pot where he is growing a mountain laurel tree in and he surrounded it with seeds to.  He told me, "These are Grammy Beans.  She is dead, but she watches over me everyday".  It was the sweetest thing!  He doesn't quite understand that she is my mom, as well as my brothers.  He was a bit confused when I was explaining it to him.  But at least he totally understands her spirit and knows she is with him always.  He was only 2 months old when she died.  I love that he carries her with him still.

BIRTHDAYS + DANCING + THRIFTING

I love today's post b/c it is so full of LIFE.  I had a very fulfilling weekend.  The first few pics are from our friend Jonny's birthday.  My scorpio friend turned 26.  It had actually been a whole damn year since the last time we had been out to his house.  This past year has kept us both very busy and life had made some twists and turns, but it was so nice to be out there again in the hills of Tarpley, surrounded by good friends, and enjoying each other like old times.  It was such a good and needed night.  Oh, and I fell in love with a girl that night.  See that beautiful brown haired sweetheart in my lap?  Her name is Pancake.  And it was love at first sight...  Oh, and we had a dance party, which basically consisted of me, Jonny & his mom while everyone else watched, like always.  Except his cousin joined us for a few songs with some really rad moves, it was awesome. 

The next night I had a date with my bestie.  We went to one of our local honky tonk bars to listen to some friends of our play their beautiful music, drink a few beers and just be with each other.  Shortly after being there the cutest little old man (must of been in his 90's) asked us to dance.  At first we sadly turned him down out pure fear of dancing.  We both get super shy about it and have turned down plenty of men during our outings, usually never batting an eye at saying no.  But this 'no' crushed our hearts.  Well... 2 songs later he got the courage to ask again, and I couldn't say no this time.  I was terrified and had no idea what I was doing, but I'm so glad I did it.  We were the only ones on the dance floor and he showed me what to do.  I think we both gifted each other a little something that night.  I'll never forget the look in his eyes.

After sleeping in the next day, James and I went to our local antique shop.  Always one of my favorite things to do.  I found a beautiful vintage belt & a free people top for $12!  Score.

Then on sunday we went to the city to celebrate my nephew turning 7.  He was so cute the whole night and had a blast at his party.  It was just family, no other kids, and he didn't mind a bit.  He loves to be with his family and gets so excited for each person who shows up.  And he was my hero.  He was shooting nerf darts with James, and when James tried to shoot me he ran over and stood front of me with his arms wide open shouting 'Don't shoot aunt Laura!  I loooooveeeee her!!!!'  ha ha, it was so cute.  He is my little monkey.

The last pic is just a pic of my sexy husband, just b/c he is sexy.  ;)